Get Real With The English Sisters - Mind Health Anxiety
Feeling Anxious? Feel calmer and get much needed anxiety relief. Listen to Mind, Health, Anxiety with The English Sisters the podcast show for mental health that will give you the tools you need to manage your life and your anxiety. Anxiety and overwhelm is on the rise today and most of us experience it in some form or other. The English Sisters, Violeta and Jutka Zuggo are clinical hypnotherapists, business women, authors, wives and mother’s of wonderful grown up children! As hosts of their show they chat about real stuff that empowers, excites and inspires well-being! Always looking to share their point of view and expertise on how you can manage your anxiety and mental health so as to enjoy life! Sharing their experiences to help you live a calmer, happier, fuller and more relaxed life. If you are in need of anxiety relief and want to learn how to manage your mental health, follow Get Real With The English Sisters - Mind Health Anxiety so as not to miss an episode! New episode weekly every Wednesday!
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Get Real With The English Sisters - Mind Health Anxiety
From FOMO to JOMO: Embracing the Joy of Missing Out and Prioritising Self-Care
But there's a light at the end of the tunnel - it's time to embrace JOMO! We share tips on disconnecting from the constant noise of social media and focusing on self-care, helping you find relief and happiness in your own world. From scheduling personal time to taking "pyjama days" and stepping away from Instagram, learn how to transition from the FOMO mindset to the JOMO way of life. So, join us for a much-needed conversation on overcoming those nagging feelings of missing out and discovering the joy in simply being present in our own lives.
Hypnotherapy coaching sessions can help if you are struggling with anxiety. Please email us at englishsisters@gmail.com if you would like help with an issue, mentioning this episode of our podcast for a special discounted rate. We work with clients worldwide over Zoom or Skype. Buy our Book Stress Free in Three Minutes available on Amazon and Kindle, to help support our work. Thank you!
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Right. So what about the fear of missing out? Have we all experienced that before? I think well, i have. I have too, but lately, wow, no, well, yeah, yeah, definitely. If you experience the fear of missing out When you say that the one else is having great time, you're just stuck at home, yeah, like you see it on social media and you think, oh gosh, it's annoying, isn't it? It's annoying, but today, in Get Real with English Sisters, we're actually going to talk about, yes, the fear of missing out, but also the joy of missing out, shamo, yeah. So stay tuned for this episode of Get Real with the English Sisters.
The English Sisters - Violeta and Jutka Zuggo:Hello everyone, hello, thank you so much for your lovely reviews. Please do just scroll down on Apple Podcasts right to the end, and you'll find that you can leave us a review there, because it really does help us grow. It helps and it encourages us to continue, to continue Podcasting, which is our favourite thing. It is our favourite thing. We went to London a few weeks ago for the podcast festival. It was such an amazing time. It was lovely to meet you all and, you know, to meet other fellow podcasters out there. So big hello to all of you, hello, hello, london, new York, wherever you're listening from Today. I mean, so let's get the fear of missing out.
The English Sisters - Violeta and Jutka Zuggo:The fear of missing out is very, very on trend at the moment. On trend Sounds awful for it to be on trend, but it is. It is because people are seeing things, these amazing things on Instagram and on TikTok, and I know, i know, and you think it can be awful, can't it? Well, you just it can be. It just could be frustrating because you think I'm just stuck at home and a lot of times, you know, on social media, you just see like little snippets of it and it's not the reality of what goes on. No, it's not. The thing is, we all know it's not the reality, don't we? Because we all know that if, especially if you like an influencer, or if you curate, you know the content that you're going to be putting online, we know it's been curated, it's been edited, it's, but there's a part of our brain that still accepts it for reality. I think you know, and, and it's difficult for us to distinguish what is and what is not Really, yes, it's different, like when we used to watch films, even though you can become totally engrossed in the film and in the movie whatever, but I think it was more separate from you than than just seeing content on your phone, because everybody can be a content creator now, can't they?
The English Sisters - Violeta and Jutka Zuggo:So you can all, which, in a way, is amazing. It's amazing. You can all like your own mini films, content, you can create your own content. And but then you, when you see other people are kind of doing better Or they're more like you than up in the movie, when you're looking at a movie star and that's more, there's a big gap between you and the star. But, like when you see somebody that's similar to you, in the same age group or doing the same kind of, you know, leading a similar life to you, because you think they did it, why can't I do it? The gap is less, it's smaller. So you think I could do that.
The English Sisters - Violeta and Jutka Zuggo:It's that next door, isn't it? Yeah, the next door thing, the door syndrome, whatever it's called. You know, if they keep it up with Jones kind of thing, exactly, if they can do it, then why aren't I doing it? And it's creepy how it can affect our psychology that way, because we feel as if it's like in our homes. Yeah, i know it can be creepy, but yeah, there you go. I think you have to be aware of it. I think it's like, once again, you have to know what's going on.
The English Sisters - Violeta and Jutka Zuggo:I think before it was going on on a smaller scale, your friends would be doing things and if you weren't doing it with them, you'd think, oh, i'm missing out on that. Well, yeah, they're all saying, listen, we're all going to a theme park. Are you coming along? and you think, ah, i don't really want to go because I want it to have like a day off at home and just chill. But then, if I don't go, they're all going to be having fun and they might show me photos of it. I mean, like when we were younger, they didn't even have all these photos. I didn't show photos. I was at eight years to get them. Well, yeah, no, but remember they had the Polaroids. Yeah, come on, it was expensive. It was expensive. Yeah, it was different, but nowadays it's not, it's super easy.
The English Sisters - Violeta and Jutka Zuggo:That's what I think you've heard it on the now there that before I mean going back a bit before the social media stuff, but you weren't that far away. No, i don't know if you can relate. Yeah, before you wouldn't have the proof, the proof, immediate proof. You wouldn't see all the photos at the end of the day or on the real. Sometimes they've even got groups going on, like your friend group that you've got on WhatsApp or whatever. You would be more disconnected. It's like if you didn't go you just you would hear about it. Yeah, oh, we had such a good time, but it was just like here, so it wasn't like you couldn't actually see all the pictures, no, and what looks like fun? The food they're eating, what's the fun they had on the roller coaster, drinking, having a drink, and everything. And you think, oh, what am I doing here? In my pajama's on the sofa, that's all.
The English Sisters - Violeta and Jutka Zuggo:That's where this, you know, the fear of missing outcomes, and that can create a lot of anxiety, i think, because you can neither be happy You wouldn't be happy if you were there at the place and you're not happy where you are. So where are you happy Where? where are you? Where are you happy? because you can't be happy with the choice you've made of just staying at home and chilling. And if you went to the place, you probably thinking I should have stayed at home. Yeah, so it's that, middle gap, that's not knowing where you are supposed to be, where you, i think you know you really have to connect with yourself. Again, disconnect with the phone, that's the truth. You have to disconnect in order to connect with yourself. Yeah, that's the harsh truth about it. No, you should, really stay away from social media. Just if you could be, ideally, if you could just turn the phone off. You know, once you've made your choice of just staying at home or doing whatever your choice is So you do think that's a secret then, just, if you want to experience Jomo, jomo, yeah, the joy of missing out, the joy yes, i was going to say the joy of staying home, yeah, well, it's the same kind, it's like a form of self-care, isn't it?
The English Sisters - Violeta and Jutka Zuggo:The joy of staying home, yes, and to fully be able to experience it without having the constant interruptions, i think it is wise to just say, okay, i'm just going to put it on airplane mode for today, so, like as if you're traveling, yeah, and you are traveling. In a way, you're traveling with an inner journey with yourself and you're connecting with yourself. So, yeah, like as if you're traveling, that's the nice way of thinking about it. Yeah, so today I'm traveling, i'm going to put my phone on airplane mode and I'm just going to chill and do whatever I want to do, to experience my home, play with my pets, whatever, i don't know. Do whatever you want to do. That you know is good for your self-care and you know it's important for you to take that time off and then you can fully enjoy it. Yeah, because I think I think, really just going around in circles again, i think the most important thing you said there was that you don't actually enjoy it when you're there. I know that's why it's so. That's it, because you have a niggling feeling that you didn't really want to do it. No, and then you hear the noise and you think, oh god, yeah, because it's never as great as it looks in the pictures, because it's all curated, that's what, even if, yes, just your friends are always having amazing time, but then when you're there, you, the reality is, you might have to wait.
The English Sisters - Violeta and Jutka Zuggo:Like once when I did something like that, i actually went out and I didn't really want to go out and and I went out and I remember that you know we went to this restaurant, not a big deal, but I didn't want to go out. But I got like, oh yeah, i got the what it called fomo. Yeah, the fear of missing out and I thought I can't always say no to everything and be such a little introvert, let me go out. And then I was there and, yes, i was trying to appreciate the actual, you know, meeting everyone. But then the conversation was, it was a bit harder than what I expected it to be. And then the food Well, yeah, i was with people that weren't particularly easy to talk to.
The English Sisters - Violeta and Jutka Zuggo:You know, that's shocking. What do you mean? Well, in the sense that it wasn't as flowing as I would have liked it to be, like easy, it wasn't chatty, it was a bit of an effort. I was a bit stunted. It was a bit stunted because I didn't know these people that well, so it was hard to find common ground with them. Yeah, it was a bit. It was a bit like yeah, they weren't like you know, the normal group of friends we have. You know who I'm referring to, but I don't have them. Oh well, anyway, never mind, they're lovely people. But I was just in that state of mind.
The English Sisters - Violeta and Jutka Zuggo:Yeah, and in the end I remember thinking yes and that, and I was hungry as well, and the waiter was taking ages to bring the food, so it, but if I, so that was a reality of it. Yeah, but then when, if I hadn't gone, i would have thought, oh, i've missed out on that, and I've said no, yes. So I think it's a bit like when you have to kind of schedule time for your job Yeah, i think so. And then, once you schedule it and you say no, i'm actually going to enjoy missing out. You know, did it? I will enjoy it. Yeah, because everything's so scheduled nowadays.
The English Sisters - Violeta and Jutka Zuggo:Sometimes, if we schedule that time for ourselves as well and for not just doing what we want to do and not always doing what someone else wants us to do, what other people's agenda, what society dictates or what's supposed to be appropriate. And you know, depending on what age group you are, what you're supposed to be doing, because there's different age groups. If you're very young, you're supposed to be, you know, oh yeah, clubbing, having a great time, and if you're not, you're going to eventually see pictures of it somewhere to prove what you missed out on. And if you're in a you know the family, creating a family then you're all supposed to be going to each other's friends' houses, and holidays are people who feel obliged to have as well, because all the pictures are out.
The English Sisters - Violeta and Jutka Zuggo:And if I remember when we were at school they said, what did you do? and if you hadn't done anything, you'd say, oh, i didn't do anything. I know, yeah, you had to write what you did. Yeah, i mean that's pretty, that's a lot of pressure. That's a lot of pressure. Yeah, i wouldn't do that. No, i wouldn't ask somebody what did you do. I mean it's, it's, that's pressure, that's pressure on the kids. You have to think you have to do something amazing every year.
The English Sisters - Violeta and Jutka Zuggo:Yeah, and then, if you just stayed at home and you didn't actually travel or do anything, what would you write in the essay? That was tricky, that was tricky. You'd have to write, oh, i went to the park. I mean you'd well, you couldn't. I mean, surely there's one or two things. But Yeah, but it was pretty boring compared to other people. So, they've been to Disney World or something. Yes, it was boring, i know. Lucky enough, we usually always travel to see family Sometimes.
The English Sisters - Violeta and Jutka Zuggo:Sometimes, i do remember being in difficulty about, well, what did you do at the weekend? and we'd done nothing. Yeah, that's, that was harder. The weekends. What did you? yeah, you had to write anyway, that's. I don't know why I'm talking about that now. Yeah, because you're referring back to your. It was like, yeah, well, it was like the fear of missing out, even in those days when there was no social media, but you'd have the pressure because you'd have to actually write it down. If you, if everyone, kept quiet and then you didn't have to do an essay on it or something, exactly The fact that you had to write it down, document it. Yeah, absolutely, it sounds so serious. Document the fun that we're having. I know What I say is really, you know, it is lovely to be able to have this Jomo time, whatever it's called.
The English Sisters - Violeta and Jutka Zuggo:You know that, just experience and joy. Whatever you want, yeah, have a self care day and just call it Pyjama day. Pyjama day even. Yeah, call it a pyjama day. We used to have those a lot, didn't we? We did, but I mean, i don't feel as doing that as much now because we were forced to kind of do it. With the pandemic, that has changed a bit. Yeah, i feel as if I want to go out more now, but that's different, because I don't feel as if I'm missing out, i just actually want to do things. Yes, yes, that's right. Yeah, but I'm also happy to like when we got back from London, i'm happy to have a couple of days at home and just do the washing and chilling. Yeah, yeah, yeah, do like potter around And do things like that in your familiar space. Yeah, that's really lovely. Yeah, Sometimes you just want to do that.
The English Sisters - Violeta and Jutka Zuggo:And since most of us do work, you know, all throughout the weekdays, so when the weekend comes, you know this pressure of having, well, i found it like liberating, like the other night when we just went out on Monday night, for instance, yeah, yeah, yeah, you're right, yeah, that was just random, yeah, cause we kind of just jumped in like I'm not that great. We went to the doctors, yeah, i mean to see the cardiologist, and then after we just stopped off and had like fun, yeah, yeah, that was, that was a bit, that was a bit out of you know, we had, we had like pizza and a little beer on the fly, sort of thing We stopped off at this cute little place and we just said, all right, let's, let's stop off. And that was cute because we were just spontaneous. It wasn't like it was a Monday night, it wasn't like no, it wasn't expected, it wasn't expected, it was no, no, pressure kind of thing.
The English Sisters - Violeta and Jutka Zuggo:It's cause sometimes when you have like this, this like the Friday night thing, the fear of missing out on Friday night or Saturday night, thursday night, people going out, a lot now, and then there's a lot of pressure on you. You know you might not be like us, but we, i mean, we want to go out. I say maybe once a week or twice, come on, yeah, not that much. That already seems like quite a lot actually going out once a week. Cause socializing we're pretty, but we're not like socialites or anything. So no way You go for a coffee and then yeah, that's it. Basically, what I'm saying is that we do.
The English Sisters - Violeta and Jutka Zuggo:It's a horrible feeling to think like on a Thursday night or a Friday night or a Saturday night, you have to be going out and doing things cause, just cause everyone else is. You know, you can also just relish that time for yourself until it's like, no, you know, i'm just going to say yeah, i'm just going to stay at home and do whatever the hell I want to do and enjoy it to the fullest, because I deserve this time and it's, it's, it's your life, you know it's, it's your life, that's it, and no one else can. Really, they actually said that. Do you remember that time when when it all you know the whole of meta went down. There was like two days, i think, where it went down.
The English Sisters - Violeta and Jutka Zuggo:There were a lot of people that did experience anxiety because their phone wasn't working, but then, on the other hand, there was a large number of people that actually experienced wellbeing from this. Yeah, i can imagine. Yeah, because they, they were. You know, when, afterwards, when the survey was done I can't remember exactly what year it was, but then when it was done, they were all saying, yes, i did experience relief, relief from it. Can you believe it? So I can, i can definitely believe it.
The English Sisters - Violeta and Jutka Zuggo:So, relief from all the social, from Instagram, from seeing everyone else's life, and it's all the noise, isn't it? It's too much. It's too much, yeah, so you turn off, you put it on airplane mode and enjoy the Jomo. Yeah, Travel within yourself. Yeah, and let us know how it goes for you, how it goes for you, and let us please do give us a five star review on Apple podcasts. But if I were, you get your podcast and do come and see us on YouTube as well, because we have a video up on YouTube. It is out And let us know what you'd like us to talk about something that will help you with your anxiety. You know, just give us a shout out. Absolutely, we'll discuss it next time. Yeah, we'll discuss it. We'll do a podcast episode on it, yep, so lots of love and smiles from the English sisters. Bye, bye.
