Get Real With The English Sisters - Mind Health Anxiety

The Power of Perseverance: Resilience, Support, and Keeping the Doors of Opportunity Open

November 28, 2023 The English Sisters - Violeta & Jutka Zuggo Episode 93
Get Real With The English Sisters - Mind Health Anxiety
The Power of Perseverance: Resilience, Support, and Keeping the Doors of Opportunity Open
Show Notes Transcript Chapter Markers

Have you ever been on the brink of giving up that dream project or study goal, only to wonder what could have been? Welcome to our latest episode, an enlightening discussion that brings forth the true power of perseverance. We engage in a deep dive into the essence of resilience and the significance of a strong support system, be it friends or family, in fuelling motivation. The conversation underscores the fact that perseverance is not easy but it’s worth it; it’s about staring down the face of challenges, knowing that the joy of achieving what we set out to do awaits us on the other side.

Provocative as it may sound, we put forth the argument that perseverance, complemented by discipline and self-esteem, has the potential to outshine natural talent. We explore the beauty of staying hopeful, of keeping those doors of opportunities ajar, even when they seem daunting or improbable. We advocate for an open mind and heart because you never know what your future holds. Come, join us on this journey of discovery. It might be filled with hurdles, but every step is a stride towards satisfaction and accomplishment. Tune in to this episode for a refreshingly new perspective on the power of grit and resilience. Also, don't forget to check out the video version of this episode on our YouTube channel.

Hypnotherapy coaching sessions can help if you are struggling with anxiety.  Please email us at englishsisters@gmail.com if you would like help with an issue, mentioning this episode of our podcast for a special discounted rate. We work with clients worldwide over Zoom or Skype. Buy our Book Stress Free in Three Minutes available on Amazon and Kindle, to help support our work. Thank you!

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Speaker 1:

Perseverance pays off. It certainly does. Does it really? Do you think it really does? I think in most cases it does, unless you're really you know not, I don't know Whether you're not really it's not something that's right for you. Yes, exactly. So there's no point persevering with something that's not really, it's not instinctively right for you and you don't. You know that. But if it's something that is right for you and you've got that gut feeling, definitely persevered. So that's what we're going to be talking about in this week's episode of Get Real with the English Sisters.

Speaker 1:

If you enjoy this podcast, please do follow the show and take a moment to leave a comment and to leave a review. Thank you so much. We are pleased to be meeting with this message of asking you to follow us and leave a review, because you know what it really does make a difference to the show. So we won't tire of telling you please, please, wherever you are in the world, just pop over and leave a review. Subscribe and leave a review Makes us grow, doesn't it? It makes us grow, for sure, definitely. And it makes us able to continue and but to produce the show. Produce the show, exactly, exactly, right.

Speaker 1:

So let's get down to the nitty-gritty about perseverance. I think if you set a goal and you persevere with it whether it's in, like, whether it's a personal goal or something that you're learning or you're doing a task yeah, if you persevere, there's going to be it's never going to be an easy Nothing worth doing. Is that easy? I don't think oh, I see where you're going, oh, I didn't get it. I didn't get it. You mean, it may be full of challenges, but it's going to be the more rewarding because of that. So, like, if your objective is to You've set the goal to get into great shape or to I don't know repaint the whole house, it's not going to be easy. No, it's going to take a lot of work. It's going to take work whether it's getting into shape you're going to have to look at nutrition, working out, etc. Or whether it's actually physically going to start painting the whole house. That's not going to be easy either, but it's going to be rewarding. Yes, there are going to be so many challenges, and you know, but it will be rewarding in the end and I personally thrive on challenges like that. I quite like them. At the end, once you've persevered and you've been through all those challenges or whatever the difficulties, satisfaction is immense. There's satisfaction. I did it, you know. Oh my gosh, I did it. I got there. I you know, whether it's running a 5k or like a fitness goal or a study goal, business goal, business goal, whatever it is, it's just so worth it. It is so worth it.

Speaker 1:

And they say, there is that saying where most people give up just when they're about to make it yeah, gosh, you know, you've got to. And how many, like how many students is when I'm thinking like give up in their final year. They've just had enough and they just abandoned their studies as well because they just burnt out, they just can't cope with it. Yeah, that is such a shame really, especially, you know, because we are anxiety therapies. We do understand that there may be a time when you just it's not healthy for you to persevere, so that's a different kind of thing. But I also think it's the way they look at it, because they might think I just can't, I can't do it now and I'm not, you know, I'm not able to, but you might be able to take a few months off or, do you know, take a break and then carry on with your persevere into getting what you wanted to in the first place? Yeah, because I think there's nothing sadder than looking back at your life and thinking you know I should have done that. No, regret is never a good one to have in your heart. No, definitely not. So I think, if you can, if you are in that situation, you can maybe future pace yourself and then look, say if I would, if, in a year's time, imagine I finished my studies, and then I look back on myself if I hadn't done that, would I still be as pleased with myself as I am now? Is if I persevered in that? Yeah, I know where you're getting. Yeah, definitely, yeah, yeah, definitely.

Speaker 1:

Well, I mean, as far as studies and university is concerned, I think there is a lot of great big part of it is perseverance, and you have to have the resilience to do that, though, and you have to be able to be in a calm mindset as well, even though I know it might be a bit tricky, but, yeah, there are some tools and some tricks to get through those phases in your life when you feel like you're just about to give up and throw the sponge and say, no, I can't handle it. A lot of the time, it's your teammates as well, and your friends and you know that come and help you. Yeah, that's true. Yeah, yeah, they can come and help. They can come and help on the door, but only if you let them in and you tell them what's going on. Yeah, yeah, I remember because, like I was thinking, when I went years ago, when I was an air hostess and I had to do all the exams I mean, I know it sounds like it's nothing compared to university, but it was in a different language because I'd applied to Alitalia, which is the Italian airline, and I had to get through all these exams and there was this technical exam.

Speaker 1:

I just didn't. I didn't really want to persevere and I didn't really want to bother. I don't know, I just like given up. So I said to all the little classmates I said, right, that's it, I'm not coming in tomorrow, I don't think this is a path for me, I'm not bothered. And then I found them all. They'd all, they all came around in the evening. I was so touched by that because I lived quite far away from where the actual.

Speaker 1:

You know, the conferences were going on and we were doing the studies and not all of them came, but like five people came and said come on, you're going to help you study, you're not giving up on this, you're coming tomorrow, let's do it together. And they helped me through it and I did. And I thought, gosh, I don't think I've ever had an inexperienced like that before, no, so I was so surprised. I thought, all right, guys, I mean, you seem to care so much. So they were persevering on your behalf, which was really sweet, because at that point I wasn't even convinced.

Speaker 1:

I thought, well, I don't even know, I mean the opportunity, the job opportunities sort of like, fell on my lap because I spoke English, et cetera, and it was the time when they were hiring and I thought, okay, but I'm glad I did it and I'm glad they persevered for me, because it did give me a chance to see the world and to experience that kind of Well, you had so many valuable experiences from it. I learned so much from being in that kind of job. So, definitely, well, that's interesting Because that's when you weren't persevering, but they persevered for you. So you can have like, yeah, I mean like the team, it's like you're the people that are on cheer, you on the cheer leaders. Yeah, I think you need people like that and that is nice, to have a support network, yeah, your friends that say, come on, come on, you can do it. You know it's like, yes, and then your perseverance isn't just your own, but it comes from a group of people that they're for you. Yeah, and a lot of the time it's not like that, though, and you just have to get that grit with you. Sometimes you just have to grit, especially nowadays when so many people work remotely. You have to have that your own internal perseverance and saying come on, just keep going, keep going.

Speaker 1:

Do you think resilience is the same as perseverance? That's a tricky one. Yeah, because it is the resilience I think. I don't know about that one. I think you put me on the spot then. No, yeah, because we've spoken a lot about resilience.

Speaker 1:

Resilience is different to perseverance, I think. I think resilience would have been in that case where you would give an up, say you were giving up, and your teammates didn't come round. The resilience would have been say, okay, I'm giving up now, but I'm going to find something else that's going to be suitable for me and I'm just going to. You know, this didn't work out and I'm just going to get on and move on and do something else, be resilient, like in the mind, in your own self. You would be resilient to carry on and you know, get up, stand up again and bounce back up and go on.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, I think that is the fundamental difference between resilience is coming, it's like a thought process, it's more mental, it comes from within, whether it's the act of persevering, is an actual physical act where you have to, you persevere by doing something physical. So they're both very Well for mental. It could be mental perseverance as well, because you could be in the exam using your mind for yeah, but you have to log in to the exam. You know what I mean. You're actually persevering by taking an action. Yeah, you're kind of like.

Speaker 1:

I think, yes, they're very same. I don't think we have to go into the integrity of each one. No, no, I think both of them are equally. Yes, if you have the resilience within you and you have the, you know the act of persevere, I think we have to persevere with that. No, no, we don't. But yeah, in general, I think that you know, where would the world be today? Well, no one Without perseverance.

Speaker 1:

Without perseverance, exactly, there was a hundred times, a million times, of radio. How many times has it rejected? Exactly the famous Harry Potter. How many times has that gone down the drain? Yeah, where would we be? Well about Van Gogh? He persisted all his life with his paintings. He only sold one painting, but now he's recognised, I mean, he'll go down and live in history forever and ever. Forever and ever. Absolutely. He'll never be forgotten. Yeah, that's a shame though, isn't it? Yeah, I would like to rewrite that and let him see today. But it also goes to show. I mean, that's also a lesson with Van Gogh, because he never got any appreciation, he just had to do his own art. But he must have had some satisfaction from doing his own art and he felt as if that's what he needed to do for humanity, and he left that wonderful gift for all of us.

Speaker 1:

So it doesn't always have to be instant gratification either. If you persevere in something, it doesn't mean you have to have instant gratification after ten years or whatever you've been doing oh no, it could take a long time. It could be just the thing that you do for selfless reasons, because you know it will benefit someone else Absolutely. You persevere at something for selfish reasons, selfless Self that was a put-by-put in it there for selfish reasons, for selfless reasons, right. A lot of times it is selfish, if you want to put it. So, even though selfish, I think, is good because it is just for yourself. There's nothing wrong with that. I don't think there is either. But yes, I see what you mean there. I mean, various studies have shown that perseverance is an essential quality for success in life. There you go.

Speaker 1:

It's a Dutch work, study 2016. Yes, I'm a Dutch work. Yeah, it often tops aptitude and raw talent. So you go. Yes, a lot of people that aren't actually that talented, but they persevere and keep going. They'll get there in the end. Yeah, it's funny, it's our ability to stick with our tasks, day after day, in our goals and our passions is vital.

Speaker 1:

Persevering entails effort and practice. Sometimes it says it's called grit, grit and discipline. Well, I don't know about discipline, but yeah, it definitely entails discipline. It informs discipline to keep going. Absolutely, you need that discipline. You need to be able to get up in the morning and say, right, I'm going to go and do that. Is it discipline or is it just like a drive that's in you, but it's also discipline. Yeah, I think those are intertwined as well, because you have to be disciplined to have that drive. Yeah, unless it's just every now and again. You do it, I suppose, but it's still kind of a discipline. You have to keep going. You do have to keep on going, yeah, even if it's raining outside, no matter what.

Speaker 1:

Sometimes you'll want to keep going, because when things are going quite well for you, you'll think, oh, this is good and you get the adrenaline shot. But then other times, when it's not going as well, you'll think, no, I want to give up, I don't want to do this anymore. Why am I doing this? You're asking yourself all these questions about why and what, for you know we're all going to die anyway. Oh gosh, yeah, yeah, that kind of mentality. And then you think, oh, there's no point. And then, well, I think probably it's okay to have those days, all those moments, and realize that Exactly Because I think that's what will happen. These two will pass. Yeah, you will have exactly.

Speaker 1:

You can't go through this journey. You might cry and think I can't handle it. Yeah, I'm going to give up. You know I can't do this. And why? Why am I doing this? And I'm sure many of you are there.

Speaker 1:

You'll get up and you'll persevere and you'll just know that you have to do it. Well, it's like it comes from within, doesn't it? It comes from, maybe, that you feel as if it's comes from self-esteem, that you feel you're worthy enough to be able to carry this out and do it. I think you're right. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And I think everyone knows what perseverance is. Oh, exactly, because we've all experienced it in our lives. Well, if you think of a little baby that perseveres in walking, how hard is it? How many times they cry when they fall over and they hurt themselves, they're toppled down, but it's just, it's something that they know, it's innate, it's innate, yeah.

Speaker 1:

So I think it is innate in all of us to persevere, yes, to persevere in what we need to do, to persevere in our goals, to find I think I was going to say meaning in life, but even just to find food. Like, if we go back in the olden time, it was just to persevere in putting a meal on the table. Well, even now, it could be like that, unfortunately. Yeah, exactly, but in these situations, it's still like that today. But I meant like when we were hunters and gatherers. But yeah, it will definitely like that today. You mean like you have to go to work to put food on the table. Absolutely, it's definitely like that today.

Speaker 1:

So you're persevering, for the ultimate goal is to feed your family, to feed yourself. Obviously, they're rewarding in the end, aren't they? Oh, yeah, that's a lot of satisfaction, and just about anything. Really, you need to persevere. I don't know what I'm thinking about. Milk, milk, yeah, maybe I need to get some. Really, you need to go and buy some milk and you don't want to buy it. No, I'm just thinking about I was thinking about those old fashioned milkmen that used to come around.

Speaker 1:

Oh, yeah, we were tiny. That was so cute. I suppose it was because I had to get up so early in the morning to deliver their milk, but they were so proud of it. Do you remember how proud they were? Well, I remember they were very happy. Well, our milkman was a Dolly fellow, he had a little car and yeah, and then what you did is you would get your milk in bottles. It sounded ancient. Yeah, oh, we were tiny.

Speaker 1:

We were tiny, yeah, in glass bottles, and each of the bottles had different colour aluminium lids. So you would have the silver, the top, the full fat, and the thin, the full fat, yeah, and then you would just leave the money in the milk bottle, didn't? Mum used to leave the money in the glass bottle, not in the glass underneath or something? Once a week? Right, yeah, that was such a handy service. But then afterwards it was really good because it was total recycling and we actually had the milk factory down the road, which we used to see all the little bottles go on the conveyor bed, so it used to get washed. Yeah, I do, it was total recycling Because when you finish your milk you put it back in and then it should bring out like a little six pack, a little metal basket.

Speaker 1:

You put all your little bottles in there, you'd rinse them out and put them back in and then the milkman would take them away and give you a whole new little six Tomorrow. Sixth year award tomorrow, yeah, the next day, depending on how many you awarded, it was a fresh milk every day and it was also a sign. Like you would know if there was like that the next on Naver. You would know if there someone was on holiday, because the milk wouldn't be there. Yeah, or you would know if they weren't well, because they wouldn't take the milk.

Speaker 1:

I remember a mum once saying oh, the lady might not be well. She hasn't opened her door to collect her little milk bottle. She went knocking on the door. So I mean, that was a nice. Yeah, obviously, they could be seen in two different ways. It was useful, but it could also be like a sign. Oh, I mean, I don't know, yeah, they're not there going Bob their house. Is that what you mean? Yeah, yeah, it was nice to come, it was very. It was calm. Yeah, we're talking about the days when you didn't have to keep shut your front door, your back door. Well, not in our neighborhood, it was a calm one. Yeah, that's supposed to be terrible then. Yes, terrible now. I don't even want to mention it. Anyway, I think we've gone off on a tangent.

Speaker 1:

So let us know how you feel about, what you feel about persevering. Do you persevere? Have you thought of giving up? We have millions of times that we carry on. I think you just have to. If you know that something's right for you. I think that's the key. If it's right for you, if you feel, if it's right for you, if you feel it, it's like the gut, that's what I'm saying. It's like come on, you've. You know you've got to do this, so you just do it, yeah, and sometimes you think you wonder why I was watching a really cute it was a Netflix series.

Speaker 1:

It was really cute about this guy that wanted to be a basketball player and in the end he kind of gave up because he couldn't make it. No one wanted him. But then he went on a basketball track and he said I don't want to go. But in the end he persevered and he went and then the football coach as she saw him there and called him up afterwards I saw you playing basketball. Do you want to come and play football for us? Oh, wow. So there is where he just he'd kind of given up on his dream of becoming a footballer, but he carried on, kind of still playing sport and still being seen, and then just by fate, you know that happened by being in the right sort of place in the right environment. It was just about carrying on, I suppose, persevering.

Speaker 1:

Well, if you'd give up completely and you close the door, nobody, you won't see any, you won't be in the world, you won't live your life. No, so, yeah, don't. So, yeah, don't close the door. Keep the doors open, keep the windows open every now and again and look and see what's out there. And, yeah, maybe, if your dream isn't that you know possible at this moment in time, it will be soon. You can keep a keep a, keep your foot in the door and don't close it, because you never know what's to come. Absolutely Thank you for listening and please do join us on YouTube too, where you can see the video version. Thank you so much. Lots of love and smiles from the English sisters. Bye, bye.

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Resilience and Perseverance
Keep the Doors Open