Reclaim Your Time: How to Deal With Time Suckers Every Day

Ever wondered why your time seems to vanish into thin air, leaving nothing but a trace of unease? Discover how social media can subtly hypnotize us into unproductive hours and how you can reclaim your day. We tackle this digital dilemma with practical strategies that help you differentiate between activities that truly relax and those that sap your energy. From Instagram scrolls to Netflix marathons, we encourage a mindful approach to leisure, offering enriching alternatives like short meditations or engaging chats that promise genuine satisfaction.

But that's not all—rediscover the enchantment of reading and the timeless charm of bookstores. Remember the thrill of childhood novels or the allure of navigating intricate storylines in multiple languages? We share personal stories that celebrate the resurgence of book culture and highlight the joy of curling up with a good read. Plus, learn how to set boundaries that protect your energy in both work and personal spheres. By prioritizing uplifting content and self-care, you can foster a more balanced and fulfilling life. Join us for insights that inspire intentional living and joyful consumption of the arts.

Hypnotherapy coaching sessions can help if you are struggling with anxiety.  Please email us at englishsisters@gmail.com if you would like help with an issue, mentioning this episode of our podcast for a special discounted rate. We work with clients worldwide over Zoom or Skype. Buy our Book Stress Free in Three Minutes available on Amazon and Kindle, to help support our work. Thank you!

Love and smiles from The English Sisters.

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Chapters

• 0:00 Time Management and Fulfillment
• 7:55 Bookstores and Reading Revival
• 19:05 Managing Energy and Boundaries

Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:00

Time suckers. Yeah, I mean time is what we need the most and what we actually use up, you know, in the worst possible way. A lot of the time, a lot of the time, we don't realise how much time we actually use up without it actually giving us any sense of fulfilment or satisfaction, and that's what we're going to be talking about in this week's episode Without it actually giving us any sense of fulfillment or satisfaction. And that's what we're going to be talking about in this week's episode of Get Real With the English Sisters. Do come and say hi on YouTube and subscribe Our YouTube channel is growing and you can watch the podcast there too and come and say hi on instagram.

Speaker 1: 0:46

So what do we waste time on the most? I think I know what I waste the time. I mean, sometimes, when I just scroll through instagram, it just keeps me. I'm like a zombie. I'll just go through one reel and another reel and just think I mean, I'm quite aware of it, yeah, but I think I I'm like drugged out by it and I just well, yeah, I can just scroll through it and I have a little laugh, and then scroll through something else and just sort of get like almost hypnotized by it, by my own, you know, by the feed that's on Instagram. So I know this is what happens to so many people and I might have wanted to go on Instagram because I actually wanted to post something for business. Yes, so that was the excuse. Yeah, that's the excuse. You open up the app and then I find something else on the feed and I find that I might you know, I mean, it's not, I get distracted. I get distracted. Yeah, I don't actually waste that much time, but do you enjoy it afterwards? Does it give you something? Does it make you feel fulfilled? No, not really. It might give me a little laugh, or sometimes they're cooking things that give me ideas. I guess, yeah, yeah, like the other day I was watching Jamie Oliver in the middle of the work, that my work day, I was supposed to be posting something about work and then Jamie Oliver popped up and he started talking about this delicious tiramisu and how to make it.

Speaker 1: 2:11

Well, I mean, I think, if you still remember it, it's quite good, because that means that you were quite mindful of what you were watching. You weren't just going through like a zombie. You're right, yeah, I did remember that. So I think, if you remember it. But I think, when you don't remember what you were doing and you just like mind mindlessly yeah, there's those funny cat ones. Yeah, well, one funny cat is cute because it might give you a laugh. But I think that's what we have to be aware of. Yes, yeah, you're absolutely right. So I think it's okay. But you know, be be wary of that.

Speaker 1: 2:42

If you are the kind of person that you know goes on like a zomba and it just time, you know, sucks away your time, maybe just don't do it, because there is a difference between enjoying and having a form of entertainment and what we are talking about today, which is the sucking of your time. Yeah, it actually makes you feel drained at the end, yes, because you've. You feel like, oh no, it was 10 am and now it's like 12. What have I done? I wanted to do this and I wanted to do that, and then that sense of frustration comes about guilt and guilt and anxiety. Yeah, so that's what we want to avoid. It's not the scrolling when you're just taking a coffee break or something and having a little laugh and you are very well entitled to do that, but I think, even when you're having a coffee break, if it does make you feel fulfilled. But if you're going to be more fulfilled by just chatting to one of your colleagues or doing something else, you know, maybe doing like I don't know, something that's going to make you feel more like fulfilled, yeah, more like maybe going through like some notes you've taken for for something, or you know doing something that's going to make you feel more fulfilled, it's you, that's.

Speaker 1: 4:00

I think that's the question you have to ask yourself does this relax me? Does it make me feel fulfilled? Does it entertain me? Because there is good value to entertainment, isn't there? Definitely, you need to relax, for goodness. I mean sometimes, like on Netflix, I do think you know, I'm just sort of am I just wasting my time away watching this program over and over again? Because you do watch it over and over again? I do, yeah, like I. I have a series and I'll watch it. I practically know everything they're going to say. But hey, I'm not wasting my time because I think it's relaxing me and it's something that's familiar and it's sort of providing me with some kind of calm. I think that's relaxing, if it really is relaxing you. But you might have to ask yourself would it be more relaxing for me to listen to a 20 minute meditation as well as watching this, maybe, yeah, you're right, yeah, that will actually, you know, make my mind be more calm and more free.

Speaker 1: 5:05

Sometimes, I think, you know, like at the end of the working day, to listen to a medicate meditations, or for me, since we're in this line of work, might feel a bit like sort of work. I don't know if you do know what I mean. So I was watching a comedy or something. Well, that's nice, but maybe, you know, limit the comedy to watching that one or two episodes and then listening to. I think that would be good advice. Yeah, definitely, yeah, that is definitely good advice. Yeah, for me, what drains drains.

Speaker 1: 5:36

What I find that sucks my time off is that the netflix were binging same. Well then, we're, but I've been. You binge on things. You've never watched on things, which I also was wondering, because last night I was actually watching this korean drama, but because, oh my god, that well, no, but I can't see that.

Speaker 1: 5:53

Well, so, for the subtitles, normally I would love to watch it in the original language, because it's just nice to hear the different tones and sounds and things, even though I can't understand a word of Korean, but because of my eyesight, I decided to put it on in Spanish, which is also good because we're half Spanish. So, and it refreshes the Spanish it does, yes, but then I was wondering is this actually good for me? Because it's a thriller and, you know, some of it's quite dark. Is it creepy A little bit? Some of it's a little bit creepy. I mean, I'm not finding it that creepy, thank gosh, but it is a little bit dark. And you're thinking why am I watching this? So last night it was getting towards really late and I was thinking this is enough. Now I'm going to wait, stop and I'll watch it tomorrow. But I do think it has given me something, because it gives me insights into how Korean dramas are filmed and everything.

Speaker 1: 6:45

But maybe I think the fact that we can binge on these things now that before we used to have to just watch one episode and then that was it, then you had to wait a whole week for the next one, and now that we can it, it does tend to suck up your time. Everything isn't there. There's a lot. There's a lot of abundance. There's a lot of abundance, yeah, in the, in our western world, and we do have to like realize that we need to sort of like you don't want to have ten spoons of sugar in your coffee, you know it's like that's a good. You need one spoon, like to be moderate. So perhaps if you do have watch ten episodes, you might have like this overloading in your brain. This, um, we've become like over stimulated by these things and then we want to stop it.

Speaker 1: 7:34

But I mean, like for me, at the weekend it's netflix said are you still watching this? Yeah, they always say that to me. Or when it came up and I thought, oh dear, I might, because I put it on in the background a lot of time. But this, I'm actually watching this properly, because if you don't watch it, you don't know. I still haven't got a clue what half of the characters are up to.

Speaker 1: 7:55

Really, I would have to watch it with you or with someone else to understand it fully. Actually, my son actually said to me Mum, why are you watching this if you can't understand? Why haven't you stopped watching? I go because I'm kind of finding it fascinating, and why do you think watching it with me? Because I would explain it? Actually I think I would be, would you what's it called? Now, you're going to get me addicted.

Speaker 1: 8:14

I don't know what it's called, even Because you know they give it these funny names that aren't even their original names. I can't even remember what it's called, to tell you the truth. Okay, so that shows how much I mean. I know why. I mean, like I just I don't think you would be that good at explaining it to me because it's very complex. I'm sure I'd be able to explain it to you. Come on, right now, when we finish this episode, you're going to show me what you're watching. Well, you're going to have to watch it and then you're going to have to tell me, but I think that half of it I can't understand what's going on because it's very complex. But is it a love and romance? What's it say? It's not love and romance, it's a thriller. That's weird for you to watch, I know, because I thought it was kind of love and romance. That's why I started watching it. Okay, right, so right, as far as the suckers the time.

Speaker 1: 9:05

But I was thinking I've got this book that my daughter gave me, called your letter, which is the same as what I'm called. Is that isabella? Yes, and I started reading it and I've read about half of it. I started reading it, like, gave me called Violetta, which is the same as what I'm called is that Isabella Lender one love? And I started reading it and I've read about half of it. I started reading it like two years ago, but it's also an eyesight thing, but it is a bit of an excuse, because I can see it with glasses on, of course, and um, but, and I was looking out yesterday when I was watching this. I was staring at and I was thinking really I should, was watching this, I was staring at it and I was thinking really I should stop watching this and I should go and read at least one or two chapters. Finish it I've read half of it and then give it to me because I want to read that book. I'm waiting for you to finish it. Well, I better give it to you now then, because God knows when I'm going to finish it.

Speaker 1: 9:45

Don't say that this is supposed to be helping each other. You're supposed to finish reading a book. We're supposed to be authors. You know we write books. Come on, our books are really tiny. Our books are small. They're very palatable.

Speaker 1: 10:02

Is this in Spanish? You're reading it? No, no, I'm reading it in English because she bought it in England. Yeah, I would have bought it. I would have read it in Spanish, but it was. You would have probably never touched it again if it was in Spanish as well.

Speaker 1: 10:14

I love Spanish, yeah, okay, yeah, I would have easily read it in Spanish. It would have been the same, practically there's no difference. That's true, because I've got an Islander book up there and it's it's actually very enjoyable. It's actually probably more enjoyable in the original language, because it sounds a bit weird in English, does it? It sounds. That's funny how you just said that. It's funny how books can sort of sound different, even though they're just the written word in your head. Yeah, they sound different. It's the language that sounds different. That's why reading is so important, because it does open up the imaginative part of our brains which we can't actually see. No, but you know that. The good news is that I was reading an article. The bookstores have actually really quadrupled their sales. They're actually booming now, really Wow, and people are loving it. So there is a return to cozying up with a book. There is something special about that. There's a complete revival for it. So that's amazing news.

Speaker 1: 11:14

The only time when I seem to really think I'm sort of allowed. Isn't this ridiculous? When I go on holiday, I'll take the book with me and put it in there and think, ah, you know, but it's so ridiculous because then I might spend hours watching the same. I'm going to be more aware of it. You might find that more relaxing to read a few chapters. I don't know, yeah, it's, yeah, it's just habit, really. You just click on the screen.

Speaker 1: 11:37

But you know the books as well. I mean, when I was little I loved reading books and I would just spend my life in them. I remember you were very, you were the biggest bookworm ever. That would be a big time sucker because I wouldn't stop reading. I would do the same with the book as I do with a series. I would binge it Totally If I had to be. If I could, we would go to the library and get the books, because you know you had to go to libraries and then you'd borrow the book and then I remember just finishing it, like, especially if it was anything to do with fairy tales, you know, little pixies in the garden and things like that, because in England they were so common those kind of books, weren't they? Yeah, in our times, and they were lovely and they would just take you into these magical worlds of fantasy, and they were beautiful and I remember finishing them as quickly you know, just devouring these books.

Speaker 1: 12:27

Yeah, I think I was just thinking now that maybe that is one of our characteristics, that we just like to spend a lot of time doing one thing. So I mean, yesterday I was desperate to go out in the garden and do gardening, but I stopped myself because I've actually got a bit of sciatica not a bit, quite a lot of it. Your back, yeah, and my back is gone, and sciatica it's gone, yeah, it's gone on holiday and I was thinking I would just go out there now and spend all day. I would just love spending all day out there just working in the garden really hard. I didn't, because I thought it's not good for me. You can't. I mean I could have, but I would have injured myself even further. You wouldn't have been able to come here today. Well, probably not. I wouldn't have been able to drive.

Speaker 1: 13:08

So it's moderation. Moderation, isn't it? That's the key. So it's your physical body that says no, but where it comes to, like when, when you scream yeah, unless your eyes hurt or something, and you get dry eyes because you're watching the screen too much. There is nothing really that sort of tells you too much, except for afterwards when you get cortisol and anxiety and all the other things that come.

Speaker 1: 13:32

But it's kind of sneaky because they're not so obvious. They're not as obvious but they do. They sort of dwell upon you like a little cloud over your head, thinking oh no, what have I done today? Yeah, oh no, it was Saturday. I could have done this and I could have done that, could have gone to the park, could have done so much, and yet what did I actually do? Oh well, I guess on video games. Yeah, I guess I relax, but do you feel relaxed? You know you've got to ask yourself that question. You know how do you feel, because the feeling will come up and it'll let you know whether and you will know whether you were, you know you you spent your time in a way that was useful to you or not useful helpful, yeah, helpful or not helpful. Exactly you, you will know, you will know.

Speaker 1: 14:18

So I mean, like I made the point this weekend, I had, like saturday, when I just sort of like had a pajama day and I thought, no, I'm just so exhausted, I don't want to do anything today. Really is that possible? And I thought, yeah, it is possible. I don't even want to get dressed. Yeah, I have days like that. Yeah, by the time the evening came I did feel a little bit, sort of like a bit itchy. I thought, oh dear. But then, sunday, I made a point, I go no, we're gonna go out, we're gonna go out. We visited this lovely chocolate sort of it's. It was a fiera, how do you say that? Like in a fair, a fair chocolate fair, where they were that I mean, I love chocolate, so that was easy to go do where they were selling all different kinds of chocolate. And in the end we bought this chocolate with some spicy, uh, chili on the top, absolutely amazing. And another one with pistachio and anyway, yeah, so that was nicer.

Speaker 1: 15:18

And I didn't just waste my sort of like Sunday just binging and watching. Yeah, something I think it's important to, it's like with everything in life, as we always say, to become aware of what you're doing. And I think once you you're aware because I mean, I was aware when I was watching this series you knew, I knew, fine well, what I was up to and if you accept it and you think it's okay. But if you start beginning to think, that didn't make me feel good, this was actually giving me quite a lot of things to think about. So it was interesting.

Speaker 1: 15:52

But If it's not interesting or you think maybe that's just a bit too much, maybe I could have read some of that book as well. I think in order, you know, a tip would be to sort of like put the thing that you want to do On hold no, not on hold. Sort of like put it near you. The book is right next to me, I can see it. Oh right, okay, because if you could put the book downstairs, you go upstairs to bed. No, me, I can see. All right, okay, because if you could put the book downstairs, you go upstairs to bed. No, it's on, you won't be bothered. Because right next to my where about my coffee, everything staring at me in the face. Well then, you really didn't want to read it then. No, I didn't think about it.

Speaker 1: 16:28

I thought about it now, now that we're doing this episode on time suckers, I'm thinking about it and thinking, yeah, there's this. I think what? I think it's a bit like eating when you overeat. Yeah, when you're, when you start feeling that you want seconds, maybe it's time to wait for 15 minutes and then see if you're still hungry and then have the second helping instead of just having it so quickly. So, maybe also 15 minutes a really long time, though. If you're at a dinner table, isn't it? It's all like, yeah, you could start clearing up and then am I still hungry? A lot of the times you won't be hungry. No, you won't be. No, no, because I'm thinking, you know, 15 minutes, everyone's off. Well, we spend quite a lot of time over dinner, so we could easily have a 15 minute conversation and then get up and have seconds.

Speaker 1: 17:16

Ok, so you say, right now, do you want another piece of lasagna or not? Yeah, wait 10, 15 minutes. And if you still want it, then have it. And the same with when you're binging on a television series turn it off, go and do something for 10, 15 minutes, something different. That's a good tip. And then, if you still want to watch it and you're fully aware that you want to watch it and it's, you know, it's been good for you that's a great tip. Yeah, because, yeah, sort of pause it and then you walk off. Yeah, go and do something else and get away from it. Yeah, that's a very good tip. Yeah, don't make it, because otherwise they just go on one after another, don't they? Well, yeah, they just go to the next episode and you're just there and you, you're, your mind hasn't even got time to think about, or when you're, it's the same.

Speaker 1: 18:02

If you're playing a video game or something, yeah, you know, go off, maybe, if you're. If you're playing a video game, go off and get ready to go out. And then you say, oh, I still want to watch this, oh, I still want to play this game. Okay, go back and play. You know that is. But when you're ready to go out, you might think, oh, no, it's sunny outside, I might want to go for a nice walk or walking up. Make me do my 30 minutes exercise. Yeah, once you get dressed it's like once you put your clothes on, put your outdoor clothes on, get ready and then decide what you want to do.

Speaker 1: 18:31

Oh, I think if I got ready, then that's it. I would never be watching it. I think you're the opposite. You need chill time. So a pajama day. We'd have to stop you and keep you in the house on purpose. Yeah, I think so.

Speaker 1: 18:43

Yeah, for me that would be because a lot of you watching might be overactive as well. You actually do need a day when you're just mindlessly binging on something and it'll actually be good for you. Yes, it's not always bad for you, no, no. You just have to think does it make me feel good afterwards? Is it's, you know, draining my time, or how's it making me feel yeah? Yeah, that is true, and and the same can happen.

Speaker 1: 19:05

You know you can have a lot of people that waste your time, like at work. I was just thinking about absolutely. You know, like these clients, that you know, for example, if you're in the sales force, you know they're not really gonna buy and and they are just slowly. You know, for example, if you're in the sales force, you know they're not really going to buy and and they are just slowly, you know, sucking away at your time and your energy. So for those people, if you can like put them on hold, say okay, we're, then we'll see you perhaps another time. I'm busy now.

Speaker 1: 19:33

You know, try and avoid them as well, because there are so many of them and we know about them as well, and in relationships as well, it could also be that person that phones you up just to moan and groan and groan and doesn't give you anything in return and sucks and drains your time and energy oh, my goodness me. And you feel terrible afterwards. Or maybe you know, don't answer that that phone call, just send them a little text and say, look, I'll catch up with you next week, or something. Yeah, a little love, heart or something. Yeah, that can be. That's a good piece of advice. Like this morning I received that phone call. I really did not want to answer it but I had to answer it and it made me feel like drained afterwards and I thought, oh, because it was like a personal call about my son, and I thought, oh gosh, but I took it and and it did not make me feel good. Yeah, I kind of did it for the other person because I knew they wanted to talk to me.

Speaker 1: 20:26

Sometimes it's good to be a bit selfish as well and think about yourself. Yeah, yeah, you know, just think about exactly because they do. There are some people that need more attention than others, obviously, and yeah, and we've also got to look after ourselves. I think we do have to look after our own mental health because otherwise it just builds up the anxiety and the stress builds up and then it's got nowhere to go. So let us think, let us tell us, tell us what you think.

Speaker 1: 20:58

Do you have things that drain your time and make you feel worse? I mean podcasts. They always make me feel better when I listen to them. Definitely Me too, I suppose, because I choose them very, very mindfully and then I listen to them, just like you know, I'm not binging on them, oh no, I listen to them carefully and I love it when I've actually got time very educational, like if I'm in a car and or wherever I am. Yeah, no, I obviously. Yes, I do love vodcasts. So let us know your thoughts and sending you lots of love and smiles from the english sisters. Bye.