Embracing Change: Lifelong Learning and Cultivating a Growth Mindset at Any Age

Embracing lifelong learning is crucial for personal growth. The discussions explore how to overcome resistance to change, the deep emotional aspects of learning, and the importance of stepping out of comfort zones for enriching experiences.

• The struggle against comfort zones 
• The psychological implications of hardening with age 
• The value of social circles and new friendships 
• Lifelong learning: a necessity, not a luxury 
• Embracing emotions to enrich life experiences 
• Techniques for stepping out of comfort zones 
• The importance of maintaining curiosity at any age 
• How learning evolves with age 

Let's keep our minds open and stay engaged in the wonders of life!

Hypnotherapy coaching sessions can help if you are struggling with anxiety.  Please email us at englishsisters@gmail.com if you would like help with an issue, mentioning this episode of our podcast for a special discounted rate. We work with clients worldwide over Zoom. Buy our BookStress Free in Three Minutes available on Amazon and Kindle, to help support our work. Thank you!

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Chapters

• 0:00 Embracing Change and Lifelong Learning
• 10:32 Rediscovering Wonder in Everyday Life
• 15:51 Staying Flexible in Mind and Body

Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:00

getting stuck in your ways and just repeating the same things again and again and refusing to do anything new. I mean, how many of us can relate to that? Yeah, it's like, in a way, we sort of like, instead of being soft and flexible to new ideas in our life, we kind of like harden, we do yeah, and we decide that we don't. We know everything and we don't want to learn exactly and like we've done everything. We've been there, done that. You know, I'm not, I'm not being flexible and I'm just stuck in my ways and, like a, an old dog can't learn new tricks, yeah, and this kind of um, it sort of creeps up on us as we grow older. But you know, I think it's something that we all have to be a little bit aware of and we can take steps to change it. Yeah, I think we need to take steps to change it and we need to fight it actively. Exactly so that's what really on with on it. Yes, really, I'm gonna go for it, I'm gonna this. I'm not letting you believe that I'm an old dog Exactly, exactly. So let's, that's what this episode is about. You know, teaching an old dog new tricks is possible. So welcome to Get Real with the English Sisters. Please do send us a text message and you can see, see where to, directly under the podcast, wherever you listen. Or leave us a comment on YouTube, because this video there's also a video version of this where you can see us, oh, learning new tricks. I mean, it can be just so easy to go about your old ways because you, I think the path known is what, what's that saying? You know, the path taken is about well trodden, it is the safest kind of thing, you know, and we do always want to go to safety, we want familiarity, we look for safe paths. That we've all taken and we all know we don't want change in general. Change is scary, change is scary. Yeah, I don't know. But then you know, you can sort of like, you know sometimes to harden like a tortoise, a turtle, a turtle, you know, I was thinking of their shells. You know they harden as they age and that makes them super safe and they live forever, sort of thing. But sometimes for us, as we age, to harden is not necessarily a good thing. But you see, some of those, those little sea creatures I don't know which ones they are specifically. Yeah, I don't know which ones they are specifically yeah, I don't know, I'm thinking of the sea now, but you know that they change their shells, don't they? Yes, they look for different ones. Homes, yeah, yeah, they look for different homes. That's it.

Speaker 1: 2:42

I think we have to be a little bit more like them, you know, in our lives, and more flexible. Exactly, we have okay, we've taken one path and we know where that's going to take us to. But also, allowing, you know, new opportunities to enter our lives can be really important for our mental health. Yeah, I'm just thinking about friends group. How many friends groups are so stuck? And then I remember when we used to have a friend group, they would never want anyone new to join. Oh my God, that's so classical. Don't bring them. No, don't bring them.

Speaker 1: 3:18

Yeah, because you had that group and you knew what you were going to talk about. You knew more or less the laughs you were going to have, exactly who you were going to hang out with, and it was like stress-free, it was disruptive. To bring a new person, a new element in yeah, who are they? Then you have to sort of like socialise again. You have to make small talk, don't you? Well, not really, but you have to talk to the person, you're not going to make them feel as if they're really left out, exactly, and they would always say, no, don't bring them. That's why it's always hard to enter an old group. Yeah, that's why it's not good, is it? No, no good, and that's, and that's how, how it becomes more difficult and how people feel more and more lonely.

Speaker 1: 3:58

I think because you get used to always hanging out with the same people and then, if you hang out with new people, it becomes a big. At first it's a real effort and I think you have to like remind yourself that making friends is is an effort. You do have to put effort. You have to go through some pain and some discomfort and some boredom. It's not always easy and you know they can turn you down and say, oh no, and they can. They can flake on you so I'm not available that day and you might think, oh, they don't really want to hang out with me. But I think you have to insist a bit. You do have to insist. You have to remember that.

Speaker 1: 4:32

You know allowing new things into your life is really really, really important, because otherwise you just harden, you become set in your ways, as they say, and I do not believe that is a good thing to become set in your ways. It's definitely that you can always learn. It's like you know that, oh, I'm too old to learn that, I'm too old to do that. I've done that, been there, what? What are you doing then? Yeah, you know life is continuously allowing us to learn, isn't it? It should be considered lifelong learning, where we consider that we're always learning.

Speaker 1: 5:08

Whether it's we can learn from anything from, from anybody, from a child, you can learn. You can learn from anything, from anybody, from a child, you can learn. You can learn loads from a child To be in the moment for a start, from pets, to be in the moment to enjoy the moments of joy. You can learn so much. And when you harden it, you know. It's yeah, and I really don't buy into this thing that when you're older, like you can't learn new things. I feel as if I can learn more now than I used to be able to learn. Paradoxically, I do, too, as if my brain is like, more developed, exactly as if I've got like more, like already, like I've got already skills that I've already learned that I can adapt and use them for new learning. Yes, yes, yes, whereas when I was younger it was all new and it was really hard and it was overwhelming. It was all overwhelming, but now you can think, oh well, I've done that, so now this? Yeah, well, we're having a bit of a laugh. You can think you know, I'm going to go back to college, or to school or back to university, I'm going to study, or just by yourself, yourself, you can study. You know, there's so many opportunities to, to learn new skills and do new things. Yeah, it's just like allowing, even if it's not actual learning in the academic sense. It's learning like, yes, you've, I've never.

Speaker 1: 6:27

Somebody says you want to come bowling, for example? I don't know, yeah, and you say, oh, I don't do that, I've never done that before. Ah, that's what it was. My um, my son's girlfriend, was saying that she went to bowling with all their group of friends and all the girls there were saying, oh no, we've never done this before. And they were all just like, folded their arms and just started chatting amongst themselves. And she said I found that so boring because I actually wanted to play exactly. And I said, if you'd played, then maybe they would have followed. And it's not just a like a boy's thing it's. It's everybody, of course not. Well, I don't know why. Apparently they were like they'll never done this before and they didn't bother, sort of thing. And they're really young. Yeah, we're talking about 20.

Speaker 1: 7:13

Yes, it's not just old people that you know. The older you get, the less it's like I've never done that, so sort of can't be bothered, and yeah, it's a bit sad really. I mean, it's not just bowling, I'm just about anything. You've never tried a new culinary experience. No, I'm not going there. Oh no, you know, we'll try it. See what it's like. Have fun and don't be fearful, because sometimes you think I'm not going there because I might get food poisoning. Oh my god, yeah, that's extreme, like going, say, to a different continent or something.

Speaker 1: 7:48

Oh, yes, you might think, allowing yourself to travel, allowing yourself to travel and experience new things. You might say, oh no, because everyone that goes there gets travel sickness and I'm not going to go. But no, because you harden. That way you harden, you may get travel sickness, but you see a doctor and then afterwards you know you've had this experience that you'll probably never experience again. Yeah, they're really important to do these things. I mean I'm personally, uh, you know, I think I think about things like that one because we've had bad experiences in the past and I do think about things like that.

Speaker 1: 8:22

But then I think, no, I'm gonna fight. You have to like, fight it, don't you going to experience this new culture, this new thing? Because you have to go against your natural instinct, which is to stick with the familiar. I don't think many people talk about this. No, it's important. Because they don't say you have to actually fight it. You have to go against your natural instinct. Yeah, go against it. That's a thing. Because you think, no, I can't be bothered, who cares? Why do I have to do that?

Speaker 1: 8:57

Listen, if the opportunity arises and one of your groups or or you suddenly see a special offer or something, say to go on this journey, I say, go for it, take the necessary precautions, make sure you're okay and all the health and everything, but then allow yourself to experience something new, because it's gonna really affect you and your life and it will make you like broaden and be more flexible. You'll learn new things, you'll feel, you'll probably make new friends, you'll see different things. It's just a whole world out there that's full of new things for us to try and I think all of us have these little thoughts that come into our minds often. You know, I wish I'd done that or I could do that, and then it's no, I can't, no, I can't, it's too hard, and you go against yourself and you you're always like convincing yourself you might have this glimmer of something new. Exactly I like oh, my, oh. I like see what they're doing, but no, it's not for me. No, just fight it and say fight it, yeah, it would be for me. I don't know if it's for me. I'm gonna try it and see. If it's for me, i'll'll give it a go, give it a go. Yeah, let's let go of that fear that we all have and it's natural to have against doing new things. But I think it's also the way we're brought up, culturally as well, because we're not brought up to think it's lifelong learning. Because I remember before we did all these studies with all our hypnotherapy and our coaching and our life coaching. You're absolutely right. I these studies, with all our hypnotherapy and our coaching and our life coaching. You're absolutely right.

Speaker 1: 10:32

I used to think that when you were 30, you've had your children. 40, you've had your kids more or less. You're settled. You go on one or two holidays a year and then that's it. If you're lucky, lucky, yeah, finance. Otherwise you go. You know, you go, maybe, loki, you go on a few day trips or whatever. Exactly that's it. Yeah, there's so much more to life.

Speaker 1: 10:44

Just so that you can feel vibrant every day and look forward and be excited about life. Yeah, because it's not normal not to be excited exactly, but what we all tend to think is that it's normal to just think, oh, boring, yeah, this is it. This is it. That's what life is like, you know, especially when you get to a certain age. That's it. It's not really. That's not natural. No, it's natural. To be excited, like a child is, about this beautiful world we're living and the beautiful universe that there is, and this, and the seasons, and and, and and and. To really get excited like little explorers in life yes, explorers, that's really cute.

Speaker 1: 11:26

Yeah, and to to allow yourself to feel emotion as well, because when I say harden in life, I mean also sometimes you can, yeah, emotionally harden as well, because you say I've done that, I've been, I do not want to go through that. My heart cannot take any more, you know. And so you harden and you close because you know, unfortunately, loved people. You know, people we love may pass away, they may leave us, and you tend to harden, don't you?

Speaker 1: 11:55

I remember now that sometimes when I watch a film and I'm watching my daughter, who's 30, and I see she cries, yeah, and you don't cry. I don't cry. I mean, sometimes I do, but most I don't cry because I have hardened, you've hardened, and I think, no, I don't want to go there, I'm not gonna go there. In that film, you don't allow yourself to become emotional. Allow myself, but maybe what if I did allow myself?

Speaker 1: 12:19

Obviously you enjoy the film a lot more. Well, you're like full of I always cry, I mean you're, you're like fully immersed in the film, yeah, but as soon as I see it's about to cry, I think, no, I'm not going to, oh, can't handle that, can't be bothered. Yeah, feeling that I think life is short. After fun, you do have to I mean you don't have to have fun feelings. I think it's important to feel emotion as well, even if it's like you might consider it negative because you're crying. I mean, like me, if I see the full moon, I will go out there, even on my own, and I know you say I'm obsessed with this full moon thing, but I'll go out there and I'll enjoy it just on my own and just think, wow, you know, this where we're living is so amazingly beautiful and and I, I love that. But you know, I I don't want to allow myself to think, oh, yeah, it's just another full moon, and just harden and not. I've seen that before. This is the sunset, yeah, cool.

Speaker 1: 13:17

The other day about about how the, how everything was invented writing and like how they associated words to sounds and that's how the first writing came about and all that. That's amazing. I was thinking how amazing it was. And then how the first loom they created the first loom with little pattern, little holes to like embroider fabrics, to make silks and things with patterns on them. Wow, which was like the precursor to computers now, because really, oh my gosh, of course you know, the first computers had those little punch cards they did. Yeah, when we were little we used to see them. Yeah, we used to play with them, yeah, and I was thinking how amazing.

Speaker 1: 13:57

And then the guy that invented I think it was the atom that no one took him seriously and in the end he died by suicide, the poor man, because he was never acknowledged for his work that he actually, you know, he, he, he realized that he realized atoms, yeah, and no one. So I was just thinking, I mean, the world and life is so amazing that we, you, could grab it by the horn. Yeah, you'd always be in a state of wonderment, but you can't't. What happens is that we light it hard and we don't, we sort of can't. We take things for granted. Yeah, maybe you take them, you can't sort of be bothered. Of course you do take things for granted, because otherwise you'd be overwhelmed all the time, like you'd see something and think, oh my God, that's gorgeous, that's so. You know, you just sort of like, sort of normal people don't do that. So you have to like, you have to say, okay, you know, unless you're like high on some substance, you don't normally just sort of marvel at the wonderment of things, the wonderment exactly. But yet there is a wonderment in everything and and and.

Speaker 1: 15:05

If we remember that, I think you know we can sort of well, I mean, how wonderful is this that we're just doing a podcast and we're just talking here and videoing it and it's going out there with on this documentary? They were talking about the first telephone, not the telephone, the first telegraphs, morse code, how they invented. I mean, we've come such a long way as human beings and we, we crave connection so much and yet we're so lonely now. So I think this all forms part of it. To go back to it all forms part of the fact that I think we are lonely as well because we do get stuck in our ways and we don't open ourselves up to new experiences and new people. Yeah, that's so true. We do not. No, we harden.

Speaker 1: 15:51

And so, you know, let's stay, let's stay, let's stay flexible in mind and spirit, in mind and body too. Because body, yeah, mind, spirit and body, and let's remember that. You know, even though you may be an old dog, you can learn new tricks and sure as hell you can flexible. But I'm doing some, some exercises. I'm not flexible either. It's making me more flexible. There you go, yeah, and I will not be conditioned by the fact that you cannot do this at a certain age and we have to fight against this.

Speaker 1: 16:25

I think we have to remember it, become aware of it, no matter what age we are, you know, 20, 30, 50, 60, whatever it is and remember that we must, you know, go against our natural comfort. You know sometimes and and allow for. You know you don't have to become overwhelmed, always doing new things, new things. Stay in your comfort zone, but then also remember that to, to allow yourself to grow, you have to step out. Step out and enjoy, yes, and into your own mind as well and enjoy. Enjoy the the fun, the fun things in life. Absolutely lots of love and smiles from the english sisters. Please leave us a message we love to hear from you bye, bye, bye.