A Simple Daily Practice For Anxiety Relief

Anxiety rarely shows up all at once. It sneaks in through the day, settling into your thoughts like dust, until you lie down at night and realize your mind still feels busy. We talk about a simple daily mental health practice we use with ourselves and with clients: “dusting your mind” so you can notice stress early, clear the clutter, and feel more grounded before anxiety has time to build. 

We start with a short story from our therapeutic writing that captures the idea: when you let the “sun” shine in, you can finally see what’s really going on inside you. From there, we connect the metaphor to practical anxiety relief strategies like quick self check-ins, taking a breath, and naming the feeling instead of judging it. We also share why tiny routines like making your bed can create momentum, reduce overwhelm, and support mental clarity through small daily wins. 

We also explore why so many adults feel anxious about changes that seem “small” on paper, including unfamiliar travel, new responsibilities, meeting new people, and being evaluated at work. We talk about how fear of the unknown and fear of authority can be linked to childhood patterns, and why self kindness is not indulgent but essential for emotional regulation. If you’re looking for relatable therapist-backed tools for anxiety management, mindfulness, and healthier thinking, this one gives you a steady place to start. 

Subscribe, share the episode with someone who needs a calmer mind, and leave us a review or a message telling us what situation you’re “dusting off” this week.

Transcript

Clearing Your Mind To Cope

SPEAKER_00 0:00

Clearing your mind noticing what's going on with your own self and how you're feeling. That's what we're going to be talking about today. So understanding how anxiety can build up over days if you don't kind of clear it out and away every day. Yes, exactly. You have to have your little duster. Dust it away. You know, clean it away. A good technique for your own mind. That's what we're going to be chatting about in this week's episode of Get Real with the English sisters. Mind health and anxiety relief. We are therapists and we are here to help you. Yeah, but now we're going to start by reading a short story that we wrote in one of our therapeutic books, Stress Free in three minutes. And it's called Dust. Often invisible to the eye, dust settles layer upon layer and lies weightless and ever so fine. It is only when the sun shines that it can be seen, and it is clear for all to see. Dust can settle in your mind if you don't allow the sun to shine. Causing problems that lead to grief, worry, and disease. Allow the sun to shine, and day by day you'll see when the dust lies. Since dust has a habit of settling quickly, you can get into the habit of dusting your mind every day. Simply by allowing the sun to shine brightly inside you. So obviously, I think the little story speaks for itself today. If we allow that sun to shine within us, we can see what's going on clearly. Whereas if we tend to just hide away and if we don't dust every day, if we don't clear our thoughts, if we don't process our thoughts every day, if we're not aware of what's going on, of how anxious we're feeling, maybe or how the problems are building up, they just tend they will get worse and worse. They kind of stack up, don't they? You'll find that by the time the evening comes and it's time for you to rest and to close your eyes, you'll feel that you still have something that needs to be cleared out, something that needs to be dusted, you know. Because you haven't done like your housekeeping for the day. So it's just like in real life when you get up and you make your bed every day, it's actually a scientific proof that you feel better. It actually does. Yeah, it's weird, isn't it? It's weird. You think, why? Well, what's the point of making my bed every day? It's kind of like a simple habit that will set your mind up for okay, I did one thing and I completed one task, so therefore the rest of the tasks that you have for the day seem to be easier because of the fact that you took that first step.

unknown 3:22

I know.

Check In With Yourself Daily

Name Anxiety To Reduce It

Normalizing Fear Around Change

The Inner Child And Authority Fear

Self Kindness And Mental Spring Cleaning

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SPEAKER_00 3:22

It's odd, isn't it? You think what's the point? Yeah, no. The other day, there is a psychological reason to making your bed apart from it looking nice. Now, the other day, my daughter's old, she's grown up now, she'll be getting married soon. Sheay. She showed me, she lives in London, and she showed me, she said, Mum, look, I don't know why she was because I said I've cleared out our wardrobe, and she was saying, Mum, look, look at my room. This is how it is at the minute. And then she she she goes, You remember I've got the blue and the pink cushions? And I go, I can't remember exactly. So I said, Show me. So she sent a photo and she had all her bed was lovely made with all the throws on and all the cushions. Oh, yeah, and then she had all little soft cutie toy toys on it. That's okay. Jelly bean babies. You never grow up enough, you can still have it. I saw it, and I said, Oh my gosh, your room looks so lovely. And she said, Yeah, mum, if I'm if I can manage to make my bed before I go out, I really feel better when I come home. I really like it. Yeah, and and and it's not it's it's because it's lovely to look at as well. She obviously enjoyed it. I like making my bed as well. Most of like 99% are make my bed. So will I. Yeah, I mean, unless uh something happens or something happens. I mean in a rush or something, or I'm ill. But normally I I like to make my bed. But for me, it's like okay, step by step I'm getting through. Like I'm doing my I did that, and then the rest of the things fall into place. And that there was an actual study done. And I can't remember what it was now, but it was on students, and they said if they managed to make their bed, they were more likely to go and then complete their homework or their their reading, whatever had to be done. It puts you in the frame of mind of saying, I've done one thing, I can do another. And I think the same thing is if we all get used to doing a little dusting and thinking, just taking that moment, you know, throughout the day. It doesn't have to be at the end of the day. No, I don't think it should be at the end of the day. It's through should be throughout your day. Just check in on yourself and see how you're feeling, see if anything's accumulating, if any feelings of anxiety or stress uh, you know, starting to brew or add up in inside you. You can just take a little step back and say, No, I just need to do a little bit of dusting. I'm just gonna clear all that stuff, take a deep breath, and just allow it to like flow away, flow away. Or accept it. If it you know, it doesn't necessarily have to flow away. Like the other day I was telling my husband, he was saying, Oh, you have to go and pick up the car now. And I was thinking, Oh gosh, I don't know where where is that mechanic that I have to go and pick up the car. I'm not sure where it is. And then I was thinking, I actually said it, I go, This is making me feel anxious because I don't know the the exact address. And he was saying, You're joking, you're feeling anxious. It's just literally, you know exactly where it is. So I said, if you give me landmarks, like you tell me it's near that coffee bar and it's near that, even don't just give me the address, you know, give me what then he was explaining it to me, and I felt calmer, but I addressed that anxiety. I said, That makes me feel anxious. So you realised it. I realized it. So by addressing it and not just keeping quiet and saying, Oh, yeah, sure, you know, I I I overcame it in a way. I overcame it, and I managed to go and and and get my car and everything. Somebody had to take me there, but because I didn't have a car. But what I mean is that sometimes if you were if you admit to yourself, and maybe it's it might, you know, it might seem like the things are small, but you can admit to yourself that you feel anxious about them. Yeah, because sometimes it's not a big deal, like you picking up your car wasn't a big deal, but you said you felt anxious about it. You actually took a moment to realise it was making you feel anxious, yeah, yeah. Whereas if you hadn't, you might have just gone on ahead and just sort of rushed on with full of adrenaline and anxiety. Oh, I'm gonna go, I don't know where this is, and then in the end, I probably would have still got it, but I wouldn't have really I wouldn't have noticed the emotions more anxious about it. Yes, you're right. You know, these things make you they seem stupid because they seem like just silly things, and like what you were saying about your niece the other day, you said that she was feeling anxious about going to a different part of Italy that she had to go to for her job. She had to get a car, and she's in her 30s as well. She was saying, uhuntie, I don't know why I'm feeling so anxious. I said I just because I asked her, I said, How's it going then? And she said, Oh, it's fine. And I said, So you like your job then? And she said, Yeah, yeah, I really enjoy my job. And then I and I noticed something on her face, and I said, You're feeling anxious about she goes, No, come on, how can I be no? It's just a silly thing, and I said, What is it? She said, Tomorrow I have to go to to to Sandenia, and and then I have to like how do you say the whole store there for she's a manager, and I said, Oh my gosh, that sounds like it could be nerf-wracking. I said, and then she said, Yeah, actually, I I haven't been sleeping, I haven't slept for three days about it. Aren't I stupid? I've done this before, and I said, No, you're not stupid, it's all change. You've got to you've got to get get on a plane, it's the unknown, then you've got to hire a car. She goes, God, I've been stressing about hiring that car. I go, and I and I said, Don't you know what the car is? She goes, No, the company does it for me. So they've chosen a car and they put it in my name. So I don't know whether it's going to be an automatic, a manual drive, and I'm so silly, aren't I? And I said, No, you're not silly. That's really normal for you to feel that way. And so she said, Really, Auntie? And I said, Absolutely. I would be so nervous. She goes, You, I mean, you like you do this, you're like all about anxiety. I go, I know, but it doesn't make me an anxiety-free person. No, it makes me aware of what I can do about it, yeah, and how to acknowledge it. And I think you, you know, you have to embrace it and say, Well, I it's gonna be a bit of a tough, you know, challenge, but I can do this because I am a strong woman and I can do this. She said, Oh my god, it sounds like I have to climb the Mount Everest. This is ridiculous. I go, No, it's not ridiculous. It's a change, any change in our lives, any small change can cause feelings. And I think if we acknowledge people think that they're the odd ones out, don't they? Yeah, it's just me. I just I I just feel like this. No, but then there's so many people that feel like that, and it's done. I mean, I noticed that my husband he gets anxious about things and he just kind of goes white, but he won't he doesn't realise that it's because he's feeling anxious about something new. He just thinks, he doesn't think anything, I don't think. He's not actually in touch with those emotions and feelings, and but he just feel he's not his usual jokey, smiley self, and he kind of internalizes and goes quiet. And half the time, when if I ask him, Are you feeling anxious? he'll he'll say no, but then he says, Maybe a little bit, and then he kind of gets in my house. But Laura says he does not feel anxious, gets in touch with me. No, absolutely not, absolutely not. And then when I get down to it, I go, maybe a little bit, and then I mean I've seen how stressed he gets when he has to go onto new new paths in every sense of the word. So it's not absolutely not true, it's just about understanding that you are and being kind to yourself, I think. No, and understanding that it's something different. We are creatures of habits, humans. We are used to doing the same thing in and out, in and out, in and out. We'll be happy with it, we get used to it. Sometimes it's stressful, but we get used to that kind of stress when it's a new kind of stress, it becomes a it can be. And then it doesn't cause fear, and and then we can accept it and we know it. We say, okay, but if you do if you do like a gentle dusting of your mind and think, yes, I'm feeling anxious, I'm feeling stressed, but I'm just gonna dust that away. It's normal. Other people are in the same situation, it can be a case. Everybody normalizes it. It normalizes it, it makes you feel like you're not the odd one out, you're not like the the weird one out there, anxiety friend. You you're just part of the normals, every single person is like that. It actually actually, in the end, she said, I'm actually going with uh there's gonna be a new person with me as well. So that was also because she didn't know her. No, she didn't know, and she would have to train her, and that was also causing her anxiety having to be. She goes, I'm gonna actually have to be with this person for four days. And I said, Well, do you have to actually share a room? She goes, Oh, god no, Auntie. The company will pay for two different hotel rooms. I said, Oh, okay, well, you know, I mean, at least it's not like sort of you know, you could get away for a bit, you couldn't like go into your room. She goes, Yeah, but most of the day I have to be with this person. I go, you might actually make a new friend. She said, Yeah, I might, I might. You're right. I have to think of it. Change her perspective on things, yeah. Change your I go, imagine how scared this girl is gonna be. And she said, You're scared, Auntie. That sounds like such a big word. I go, yeah, but fear is is is must in so many things that we're not aware, we're actually feeling fear. Anxiety is just another word for fear. So once you acknowledge that you're frightened of something, yeah, because you think that only children are frightened, aren't you? Yeah, but there's where there that child is within us. We have all that learned behavior that we have learned as a child. If you were told to be quiet a lot as a child, you'll tend to quiten your own feelings and your own emotions, and you won't speak up as much as all the children will, you know, as all the adults will, because that child within you. We've we've seen this over and over again. That's true. Yeah, you've been told be quiet. You you will tend to be more quiet than somebody that was encouraged to speak, perhaps at the dinner table. Why are you not because I'm thinking it's not a good time for you to tell me to be quiet when we're doing our podcast? No, no, but I mean, I'm not telling you to be quiet, but I know that, like, for example, we have been told to be quiet at the dinner table many a time. Not just at the dinner table. At school, often, yeah. We were always told to be quiet, not to speak up, it was the opposite. So we have a fear, especially you have more of a fear of authority than I do. Yeah. Because I think I had to sort of rebel a little bit as a younger one. Yes. Uh-huh. Whereas you had to comply to everything, and you were terrified of any kind of authority. So it's it's because it's funny how you know this reflects in our adult lives, is what I'm saying. And if we dust, we can become aware of that. We can recognise certain emotions are fear, fear of the unknown, fear of messing up. Like my my my little not my little my nie uh my niece is uh what yeah, my niece, she she's going, she she was frightened also of the the the rapport she was gonna get at the end of it. Because your judge, you're you know, you have uh a point system of how well you did. Yeah, and so that she was frightened of it. So, yes, so um you mean of the company? Yeah, yeah, the company, she had a point system, yeah. It's all about I mean it all comes in layers, doesn't it? It's a layer of the the the person above you, maybe giving you marks that all comes down from when you were at school and you got marked for your for your performance, and it goes into your work life when really you're an adult by then, you shouldn't really be thinking about things like that. Well, obviously, I mean you you can, but if you're gonna do your best, you shouldn't be fearful of you. There should be no fear attached, it's all learning, it should be all learning and feedback, yes, yes. Yeah, yeah, you're absolutely right. So I think if we've learned to do that, if we I think if we learn to dust our mind a little bit every day, well it's good without letting the dust settle. And let the sun shine in, let all the good feelings in. So remember the times when we've done something, say we're fearful of doing a trip or something or going somewhere. Remember all the times that we've already done it and that we've had you know a successful outcome. Exactly, yeah. And that we know how to do it, really, and this is just a fear that really is not it's it has to be accepted, but it's it doesn't have to take over, it can be dusted away. We can be kind and accept it and say, Yes, I see you, I know, I know, I know this feeling, you know. Hello, but now I'm gonna let the sun shine in and I'm gonna clear this dust away. I'm going to clear it from my mind, and because I've done things like this before, and I know how to get through it, you know, and I think that those words of kindness to yourself are really important. They are important because I think we're so often we're so hard on ourselves, and we don't and we judge ourselves so much for feeling anxious when it's just normal to feel anxious because it's just a different thing we're doing, that's something that's not in our comfort zone, or it is in our comfort zone, but hey, we did it yesterday, but we're still doing it again today, and we still feel fearful. But we're gonna conquer that fear and we're gonna accept it, and by accepting it, you conquer it, don't you? You see it as a challenge, and you say, Okay, I've done this before, I can do it again. I've done, I've overcome so many challenges in my life, and it can be boring, just like dusting can get really boring if you're doing it again and again. But just like dusting, we need to have the habit of being able to clear our minds from things that are inevitably and inevitably going to accumulate because it's just part of life. That's what life is. And just like when you dust a piece of furniture, when it's lovely and shiny, you can actually see the clear veins of the wood, you can see how beautiful it is, and your mind can be like that, it can be this beautiful creation that can be so productive for you if it is clean and free of fear, anxiety, grief, all those things that pile on, pile on, pile on. So it's time to have, you know, it's time to give it a good spring cleaning. Yes, good dusting, a good dusting, and to become aware of it and say, okay, this can go. This can go. Okay, let us know you don't go. Can you please click subscribe and follow us wherever you get your podcast and leave us a message? You can leave us a text message too. And if you'd like to support the podcast, you can also support it for a small fee. But that's only if you wish to. That's no obligation because we love doing what we do and we love giving out this advice and our life experience to you. Yes, yes, it is a privilege to us, it's an honour for any to know that anybody listens, you know, for everybody that listens, it's uh it's an absolute privilege for us to be able to share our experiences with you. Yes, so thank you very much. Please, please come and say hi on YouTube where we have the video version of the podcast, and we have our shorts as well, and uh all our little things we get up to during the day. Come and say hi. Lots of love and source from the English sisters. Bye.